It’s a whole new world out there and as the world moves toward more virtual access, so am I.
I am happy to have ongoing sessions virtually, return to in person sessions once it seems feasible or any combination of the two.
Therapy with me is guided by the belief that successful psychotherapy is more about the relationship between therapist and client than any particular applied treatment. Our relationship is at the center of your therapy and I focus on cultivating it by remaining curious, open, non judgmental and welcoming to any and all feelings, thoughts and feedback. My approach is best described as eclectic but I am deeply influenced by attachment theory, evolutionary and existential psychotherapy. I strongly believe that there is room for the entire breadth of human experience in therapy, including humor. Creating a space where you feel heard, understood and comfortable to share even the most vulnerable moments is what gives the work meaning and leads effectiveness.
A little more information about the jargon of “attachment theory” and “existentialism”:
Attachment theory emphasizes the importance of early relationships and their impact on an individual's development and well-being. According to attachment theory, human beings have an innate need for secure emotional connections with others. The quality of these early attachments influences how individuals perceive and relate to themselves and others throughout their lives. In individual psychotherapy, an attachment lens highlights the significance of the therapeutic relationship as a platform for healing and growth. The therapist serves as a secure base, offering empathy, acceptance, and consistent support. Through a warm and attuned therapeutic alliance, clients have the opportunity to explore and understand their attachment patterns, gain insight into how these patterns may affect their current relationships and overall functioning, and develop more secure and satisfying ways of relating.
Existentialism, on the other hand, focuses on the individual's search for meaning, purpose, and authenticity in the face of existential concerns such as death, freedom, responsibility, and the inherent uncertainty of existence. Existential philosophy recognizes that each individual is responsible for creating their own meaning and living a life that aligns with their values and beliefs. An existential perspective emphasizes the exploration of clients' existential concerns and their subjective experiences of meaning and purpose. The therapist facilitates an exploration of clients' fundamental questions about their existence, identity, values, and the choices they make. By encouraging clients to confront existential anxieties and dilemmas, therapy provides a space for clients to reflect on their lives, clarify their values, and make choices that are authentic and meaningful to them.
$200 per session
(sliding scale available)
“The human psyche, like human bones, is strongly inclined towards self-healing.”
― John Bowlby
Couples therapy is complicated and rarely easy. I can’t promise that it will guarantee to keep you together and I definitely can’t promise that you won’t argue. In fact, conflict is not what usually destroys relationships. It's the avoidance of conflict, evasion, suppression, displacement, etc of difficult feelings that creates obstacles to connection, security and healing after inevitable disagreement occurs.
Couples therapy is focused on identifying patterns of connection and disconnection, learning to speak what you felt couldn’t be said before, understanding each other’s original attachment wounds from long ago, recognizing how they still play a role in the feedback loops partners create in relationships and helping each other heal those wounds and developing a more secure attachment to each other.
So much of the conflict romantic partners find themselves in stems from the underlying need of self preservation, protection against vulnerability and avoidance of feared (sometimes imagined) truths. It is rarely actually about the dishes, the toilet seat or the trash. It is what’s communicated indirectly and implicitly to each other. Since my approach to couples therapy is deeply influenced by Emotionally Focused Therapy and Attachment Theory, it is imperative to recognize that romantic partnerships activate deep-seated attachment needs and insecurities. Each partner brings their own attachment style, shaped by their early experiences with caregivers, into the relationship. These experiences color the filter through which we interpret many of our interactions.
I will be there every step of the way as you learn each other’s language and how to use it to strengthen, reinvigorate and reinforce your bond. I am there to help you make room for whatever you previously believed couldn’t be said or explored. Together, we will work on each partner becoming a secure base, a safe haven for the other through emotional attunement, effective communication and responsiveness. A new way of relating to each other IS possible, we may not know the destination when we start but we can gain a lot in the process.